The Weekend Watchlist

The holidays are almost over, but that doesn’t mean you can’t squeeze in at least another 100 hours of entertainment into your open schedule before it’s time to get back to work. Yes, we’re all making frequent visits to the closest luxury theater (STAR WARS WAS AMEEZING), but streaming gets MORE than its fair share of love over the holidays as well (GOODBYE BRIGHT, PLS NEVER COME BACK). That being said, here’s a list of some great options you can squeeze in between inhaling the entirety of a leftover holiday ham and force-feeding your tree even though it’s BEEN dead and is now covered in spiders!

Election (1999) - You know what? This has been sittin’ in my queue for what feels like a century and yet it still has not been swallowed up by an ending contract/licensing deal. Well, my friends, that fateful day is IMMINENT because this Alexander Payne penned/directed (The Descendants) high school black comedy starring a young Reese Witherspoon and Matthew Broderick is leaving Hulu SOON.

I don’t know much about it, other than that Reese’s character is running for student body president and a popular social studies teacher (Matthew Broderick) wants to stop her from winning, but I HAVE heard that it is excellent. And honestly? Almost every Alexander Payne movie I’ve seen is good and extremely satisfying. Although, Downsizing looks pretty whacky right!? Anyway, yeah. Check this one out before it leaves! I know I will be.

Streaming on Hulu (Expiring Soon)

Columbus (2017) - Another I have not seen but am itching to see! It’s a drama starring John Cho and Haley Lu Richardson (Split) in which the two meet and discuss their qualms, hopes, and desires while admiring and interacting with the architecture of Columbus, Indiana. Now, that is an objectively boring sentence but cool architecture is NOT! And neither is strangers meeting and waxing philosophically— at least when it’s done right.

But fear not, reader; I’ve heard this one is done just right and one of the best of the year. The internet told me. The internet is always right. I get all of my information from Twitter. Do you trust me?

Streaming on Hulu

Winter’s Bone (2010) - The film that kickstarted Jennifer Lawrence’s career and cleared the path for her to play a Native American in the Hunger Games movies (Katniss was supposedly racially ambiguous, but c’mon, she was meant to be of Native American descent). If you’re in a solemn mood and just want to cry it all out, give this one a watch. J-Law’s character is the sole caretaker of her family, including her mother, and she must find her estranged father in order to save their house from becoming evicted.

If you live in the mid-west currently and want to pair the tundra-like environment we are being forced to live through with its visual equivalent, put on your ushanka and press play on this one. Unfortunately, I have not seen all of it, but what I have seen is wonderful. Also, this one is directed by a woman: Debra Granik. Since there’s like, 3 of those in existence (according to Hollywood), give this a shot! You owe it to yourself to not watch something created by a man for 2 hours. Seriously, why do we do that to ourselves? Matriarchy pls.

Streaming on Hulu

Bob’s Burgers (Season 5), Episode 5 “Best Burgers” and (Season 8) Episodes 6 and 7 “The Bleakening” - If you have not accepted Bob’s Burgers as the seminal classic animated show of contemporary pop culture, well then it is time you do so. BYE Family Guy, you were barely ever good. Sorry, The Simpsons, we still love ya, but you just don’t hit your marks like you used to. Bob’s Burgers is consistently hilarious, smart, and ingenious, AND IT BARELY EVEN TRIES. It’s probably because everyone that works on it is super smart and hilarious. Between John Roberts’ brillz voice work as Linda, Kristen Schaall’s mischevious Louise, the lovable neuroticism of Bob, and our nation’s newest and greatest icon, Gene, I could watch this show ALL. DAMN. DAY.

I watched these two aforementioned episodes this week and man did they make me laugh. “The Bleakening” is an hour-long, iconic Christmas episode that incorporates the show’s musical sensibilities and Linda at her best as she searches for her missing ornaments. “Best Burgers” is a beyond classic episode of the show, in which the kids must run errands for Bob while himself and Linda compete in a Best Burger cooking competition. Come for the competition’s host taking passive aggressive digs at Bob, STAY for literally everything Gene says and does in this episode. There is one particular moment that involves a “hot fudge car wash” that simply can’t be missed.

Streaming on Hulu

So hopefully those are some gems in the barrage of entertainment available at your fingertips! Hopefully those fingertips don’t have frostbite! It’s so cold. My right foot has shattered but I think my internal organs are doing okay. I’m just really tired of my house turning into an igloo against my will. STAY WARM FOLKS AND GET TO WATCHIN’!

Honorable mentions: It Comes At Night (2017) on Amazon Prime, The Big Sick (2017) on Amazon Prime, and Mindhunter (Season 1) on Netflix.

New in Theaters This Week...nothing!